Monday, March 31, 2008

march firtyfurst

it's my little sister , little sussy Nicole's 23 rd birthday today! 


sorry the quality of this pic is terrible (can't figure out how to work the scanner -that's what boyfriends are for) and i promise it's the last time you'll see me topless......

and since nicole won't return my phone call, i'll tell you why i love her:

1. nicole is clever
2. nicole is funny
3. nicole is not very excitable but when she's excited, it's infectious
4. nicole is good at everything
5. nicole is skinnier than me
6. nicole is smart
7. nicole has an eye for everything
8. nicole sees beauty in details
9. nicole is passionate
10. nicole is fair
11. nicole always takes my headshots even when she doesn't want to and still mocks me anyway. 
12. nicole is a chef. i like to eat what she makes.
13. nicole is a good teacher
14. nicole is artistic
15. nicole loves details
16. nicole is mellow
17. nicole is opinionated
18. nicole is lovely
19. nicole is simple
20. nicole is my little sister and even though i put soap in her eyes, beat her up, call and give her a pice of my mind, eat her food, abuse her talents and time, she still loves me and i love her. .......even if she doesn't call me back....

happy birthday coe!

lolololove lulululululu


so i pretty much love lululemon and feel super bad for those of you without a lulu store (why don't they sell online?!trust, i know the feeling, i used to hop to toronto for a lulu fix) and now that i'm teaching yoga privately as well as at Club H (email for schedule, details, private rates), i had to pick up a few provisions. ...

i LIVE in the still pant (pictured above in both shots) for rehearsals, teaching, lounging, erranding and i LOVE their tops (boosies pushed up and held in nicely and ample in the waist to prevent muffin-topping). Got a cool mesh cut out top that wasn't pictured on the website. 
the material never loses shape or color and feels sooo nice. 

they should pay me for that ad.

daily bread

dear starbucks breakfast sandwiches,
i love love love you. what a tasty way to get my carbs/protein/stomach filler for only $3.20. you are a perfect pre show dinner, quick lunch, or fueling breakfast. i'm partial to your reduced-fat turkey bacon variety (i'll travel to multiple starbucks just to find you--they're on every block, it' not that much of a hike) but really love the sausage and ham as well- when i have extra calories splurge. 
you are my favorite alternative to pb & j. 

salty kisses, n*

Sunday, March 30, 2008

italian stallion


i may or may not have dated a delicious mafia man who wasn't so keen on my decision to abstain from sex....... 

guido: "YOU CAN'T PUT A STALLION IN A CORNAH!!! (isn't it "baby in a corner"? and why are you ALWAYS yelling!!? ) I'M A THOROUGHBRED!! LOOK AT ME! YOU CAN'T PUT A THOROUGHBRED IN A ROOM! I NEED TO RUN FREE!!!!!

so i let the man from snowy river run free....but the story remains. how could it not?

 word for word. 

pressie for my trouble

so i've been eying this little sussy from anthro 




and since i've unexpectedly been RIZZO for seven shows this week, i may just buy myself that little pressie for my efforts. 

tie me up.

while waiting in the boarding area of jetblue  (enroute from slc-nyc on the vicious red-eye), i saw a heath ledger (RIP) look alike (this was pre-heath's death). his head was hunched over in a phone booth with a slivery straw-like tool. i suspiciously watched his actions. was it heath? no. what is he doing????
i'm a ny'er. i know things. he was OBVIOUSLY snorting cocaine. that was clear. i watched him with curiosity and once we stood in line to board, he queued  right behind me. he started chatting me up (that's what happens when you have a puppy nugget) and the next thing i knew, he was sitting next to me.. a coke head sitting next to me and my child! how exciting and dangerous at the same time.   he pulled out his coke case, opened it up on the tray table and pulled out various tools. curious, i thought...... then he told me the awful truth, we was tying flies for flyfishing. we later spent several days hanging in the city as he taught me the way of the fisherman. and left me with a tie to remember him.

Saturday, March 29, 2008

south african cheeseburgers

i once dated a clever man from South Africa who put sliced bananas on his cheeseburger. it wasn't so bad and i suppose it's a good way to get more potassium. 

true story. 

ladies who lunch


Nicole's polas of my favorite treat

*creamier than pinkberry and red mango and much more tart and satisfying*


BFF Worthie and i have weekly BLOOMIE'S fro yo gatherings. we usually sit @ 40 carrots  and lunch, gossip, encourage and download but Stellie doesn't like to hide in her bag lately, and we're FRAZZLED by the UES ladies with big a$$ rocks who are hostile. seriously? you're getting yogurt! this should be your happiest moment of the day!!! 
anyway, lately, we've found solace on the steps right next to bedding. it's quiet, stellie nugget can come out of her bag, and we're in peace. 



we realized S really likes yogurt-look above, she's already reaching for it...

she's such a fat girl, note the wild pms'ish look in her eyes!


entire head in. sticky puppy


high flying adored.


karen turned me on to my next adventure


i'm pretty much wet-my-pants-terrified of heights so trapeze school will be AMAZING!!! 



Friday, March 28, 2008

HELLO lover.

love love love you, marc. 
love this green

shake me baby!


isn't this sexy?!

i am in love.  it's been for 2 years now. it's a long fulfilling relationship and you should know about it. 

i love the shake shack. 

but i have a rule..... i don't like to go there by myself. i feel like a fat kid eating that way all alone!! not to mention the total sexiness of the over all experience. it's a great date. little lights, sitting outside in the middle of madison sq park...... lovely. 
so if i bring my little puppy nugget stella, we'll sit outside while she eats her shake shack poochini treat and i'll have a shack burger + (fries OR a shake--never both, mom says). 
well spring had sprung on monday and, well, my date misunderstood our meeting time, so, well....... i had a SHACK BURGER, fries (all of them), and a dark chocolate/strawberry shake. by myself. 
and it felt good. 

i may even do it again... as long as i continue dancing 8 shows/wk, that is. ...

*for you Upper West Siders, the Shack is opening it's second location on 77th and amsterdam. hip hip.... 

pay for dessert!

while on a lovely date with a gorgeous model/actor (aren't they ALL?!), we shared a $9 pizza (cause it was post show) then went for dessert. HE paid for pizza (after i politely reached for the wallet, opened it, and PULLED OUT A CREDIT CARD!----- i should never have gotten to step 3) 

later, once pay time came for magnolia cupcakes, he literally gave me the:

model/actor: "i got dinner, you get dessert"

really? REALLY?! 

i KNOW you probably don't make a whole lot of money, but if YOU ask me out,  YOU are obligated to PAY!! 

and seriously, dinner/dessert grand total of $15  and a whole lifetime of subsequent disrespect. 

anybody know a man who will pay for all courses?

namaste*

fo rizzle.

i've been BETTY RIZZO in GREASE for the last three performances...... maybe more, we'll see...

I've lost count of how many performances i've done.....note the fancy dressing rooms. 
broadway is so glamorous. 

my hair's a little wild in this one 

don't envy me. the bra is steel tipped, i'm sure. seriously, i gore kenickie every time we get that nice roll behind the bleachers. 
saldivar is a lovely kisser.
 i have a hard job. 

DON'T DIE ON ME!!!

stellie ate a BIG hunk of my post-show PMS treat -
dark CHOCOLATE cake from Amy's Bread 
I DESERVED IT!!

i hope she doesn't die! 
the emergency vet nurse said she wont.

Thursday, March 27, 2008

you raise me up......

a tale of a hot air ballon stalker 

after dating pedro (an eccentric-former-millionaire-hot air balloon enthusiast) in NYC for longer than i should have, though not long at all- due to boredom and mystery, i guess- i decided to end the relationship to pursue another option. i took the high road. i actually called him (as opposed to giving him the FO (fadeout)) when i was safely out of NY and home in Utah for the holidays. i thanked him for a lovely/bizarre experience and told him i was going to be exclusive with my new beaux. pedro was saddened by the news but offered to take us both  on a hot air balloon ride.... yes, a hot air balloon ride. apparently he owned SEVERAL hot air balloons (what next? a bag of hair? dungeons and dragons?)

me: "WHAT part of the three of us in a hot air balloon over the timpanogos mountains sounds like a good idea? SOMEBODY's going over. aaaannnnd..... i'm afraid it'll be me. no thanks."

*the next day whilst enjoying maglebey's fresh french toast syrup HEAVEN*

phone message (i OBVIOUSLY screened his call) from pedro: "hey natalie *ppppsssssshshhhhhhhttttt (thats the sound of a hot air balloon firing)*, i'm right above your house! *pppppppsssssssshhhhhhhttttt* come out!!

um. ... creeeeeepy. how does he know where i live?! 

||ignored||

*the very NEXT day*

i drove little sister's green bug (which had been parked outside the family homestead the previous day). as i was emerging from massage heaven @ cousin kevin's house (seriously, this man is a HEALER--ask me for details) i peer up though my crunched lashes and massage fog to see pedro HOVERING over the car in the aforementioned HOT AIR BALLOON!!!!

pedro: "HEEEEEYYYYY natalie!!!! ppppppssssshhhhhhttttttt "

me: no response. IS THIS A DREAM?!

pedro: "HEEEYYYYY ! do you want me to throw the ladder down? come UP!"

me: some sort of mumbled response like "oooh i've gotta get the car back" and a swift reach for the keys!!!!!

REALLY?!

*the day after that*

a little creeped out, i head to the hills for a ski day @ Deer Valley.... i kid you not, halfway thru the glorious powder day, someone spots the balloon HOVERING over Deer Valley. 


and that's the week i was stalked by a supremely unbalanced person in a hot air balloon. 

true story




i know who i am now


this blog is about dating mishaps (and i have many) and triumphs (fewer) 
and all things manhattan. 
i will change the names to protect the bachelors so please, if you know who i'm talking about, please keep it to yourself. i will. this world is small and hurt feelings are to be avoided....... these stories and insights (which i have been begged to share time and time again) needed a cyber home and i needed a place to stream them together....... and possibly write a treatment for a sit-com?
 we'll see.... thanks for reading. 

pictured : moi and stella playing in our first (and not the last, i swear) visit to south hampton

Monday, March 3, 2008

here i am

so i always thought blogging was for my uber talented sister or mommy friends..... and it is. i mean, really... who cares what's what with me........but maybe i'll foray into the blogging world and see what happens.... will this be a public blog? or just a friends and family sort of thing?
 i dunno... but today, a blog is born.
 we'll see what happens.