{ bachelor ben } episode 7 - the dr checks out.

my family has bachelor fever. you should see mom's HILARIOUS courtney impersonation...

if you see her around, definitely ask her to do her poses. 

last week was such an epic bore they had to spice it up and send casey home.. let's hope this week is more exciting. 

1. woof! ben in a tank top!
2. woof! ben in a sunburn matching t shirt.
3. where'd you get that tank top? gap maternity? - adam
4. these bachelor travel days have to be hilarious and drunk....
5. i like national tour travel days only better cause no one eats and just drinks. 
6. gorgeous. yes, belize!
7. kacie is adorable. 
8. 4 other girls and a shark! yes, dr. yes!
9. lindzi! enough with the frosty!
10. this whole squinting into the sun thing is really showing me who needs botox the most..
11. nikki just looks frumpty dumpty... she could flatter that body- no white skinnies on tv or sports bra uniboobs. 
12. why is she crying?! 
13. maybe you're realizing .... you're severely unbalanced?
14. but the neon bikini is hot. 
15. he looks like a fat woman in that tank situation. 
16. cute dress on lindzi. 
17. oop another copter. 
18. even emily is calling him a cheesecake.... woof. 
19. wouldn't it be great if someone fell out of the copter?!
20. i love when the bachelors instruct the dummies on things they were just briefed on....(i realize. ending this in a preposition... we'll hold the grammar on the bach run downs.)
21. are we going to hear more "taking the plunge" metaphors?
22. lifeguard ali informs me that that height is not that great. because they'd have to wear vests or they'd break necks...
23. adam says it's 18 feet. 
24. smokey eye is not a good look for the beach, gurl.
25. overcoming that fear?! heard that 3x before. 
26. would someone please give that girl a speech therapist?! she's killing me. 
27. keep your legs together, lindzzzz.
28. why the internal fight?~ he's not a polygamist!
29. or a catch...- nicole.
30. i like that peach on her. 
31. woooooah... everything about that makeup is bad... 
32. keep you eyes open! she's wasted!
33.  she's really naturally beautiful she should really cut back on the makeup.
34. how is cheryl teigs even still here?!
35. model wants to kill herself ?
36. good fake tears, court! 
37. the kleenex is tots effective. 
38. ben looks bored with lindz.
39. nic thinks he's doing one on ones with people he's not sure about. 
40. there we go. there's a leg cross... away from him. bad body language. 
41. "once upon a time" is DR like??? 
42. what kind of doctors are you going to?
43. are we really re watching this in a fliter?
44. OOOp! that writing is NOT the 14 yr old girl writing that's on the date love notes...- adam.
45. must be harrison. 
46. what have they been thru?! jumping out of a helicopter was so traumatic. 
47. sweet boob & back bra shot.
48. i love the villan music whenever courtney comes on. 
49. gorgeous sunsets! i want to go to belize!
50. cute little dress, emily. 
51. thanks for that up the butt shot of ben. needed that like a rash.
52. sweet gay boy deep V.
53. did he put some frizz-ease in? is he reading my recipe for curly girls? he looks less frizzy on this date. 
54. ben sweating.... no thanks. 
55. she has the cutest little body. 
56. are they putting a bandana over her mic pack? or is that part of the dress?
57. oooh a lobster hunt? now THAT's unexpected!! 
58. sure! spontaneous!
59. cute kini. are her boobs fake? it's nearly impossible to keep up a mono kini with a rack that big. 
60. i don't believe that he caught that for one minute! -dad.
61. i'm dying over these sunsets. 
62. emily apologized, you whore! let it go! 
63. ugh. i can NOT tolerate people like courtney... 
64. oh now she's so strong. 
65. she'll go skinny dipping and throw herself at you but won't take you home to meet your family?! she has messed up standards- adam.
66. she won't accept a rose if she doesn't get a one on one?! she's a manipulative deludinoid. 
67. emily's wavy hair looks fantastic. 
68. hate that dress. 
69. actually... i like that dress now. 
70. love a halter like that. 
71. i like this girl. i hope she has the sense not to deal with him. 
72. oh yeah courtney! none of the other girls want a one on one...
73. court: i don't know if i want to introduce him to my folks...
74. well you introduced him to herpes- adam.
75. these girls faces are killing me. 
76. just eye rolls. 
77. i wish one of them would just lash out at her. 
78. snap?!?! she's gross. 
79. courtney is such good tv. 
80. "courtney and I's." he's so smart. 
81. she's a model!
82. LAMANAI- you mormons thinking the same thing i am?
83. why did court just pull up her shirt to expose her stomach. 
84. she's bored to tears with him. this is just a game. 
85. yikes. her legs aren't so fab. 
86. emily's body is 10x better. 
87. how is no one else near the temple? they shooting this at 6 am?
88. "unload a bunch of feelings" i'll bet that won't scare dudes away. i'm totally going to use that. 
89. she's just rambling and unloading.... and manipulating. 
90. i love that all the other girls are backing up emily now....
91. i really really like emily. 
92. nikki is cute and sweet when she's not wasted. 
93. hey acne!
94. oh ben is SO whipped!
95. wait, courtney HAS a family? surely no father.....
96. harder for me than for some of the girls?! she's a nutbag. 
97. love the posturing. she's a bad model.
98. "weird?" she's not weird. she's a sociopath. 
99. sure wish i had some sunglasses- mom. 
100. these cellulite upshots are not kind. 
101. ooooh a STEP metaphor! did she read this on a cue card?
102. you know the last thing they want is wine.... somebody give those fried eggs a gatorade.
103. wonder how long they had to stand there for that copter shot. 
104. gorgeous. i want to go to there. 
105. "oh my DAD?!" using the name of your dad in vain?!
106. that bright is good and nadal'ish on him. 
107. this girl is GOOD!-nicole.
108. she'a master manipulator.
109. well played, court. it's a dangle game! 
110. i am SO bored by this manipulation discussion.....
111. yeah... i'm sure no one has EVER said they've had clarity talking to you....
112. the producers are LOVING her. 
113. pot... meet kettle.....
114. "guy friends" cue furrowed brow on ben.
115. is he really buying this bs?
116. did he just zone out? look at his glassy eyes. 
117. he's abducting them? creeper.
118. yeah they'll freak out. i hope someone pulls a taser on them.  
119. oooh what a surprise! i went to sleep with earrings and makeup on! 
120. is kacie sleeping with her blankie?
121. nikki looks great without makeup. 
122. all the men in the room were grossed out by the shaving.... 
123. come ON!
124. the sunrise is exquisite!
125. the biggest challenge of this date was who looks best without makeup. 
126. at least those girls are fun and like each other. 
127. i like cheryl teig's little striped dress.
128. champers at 5 am?! vomit. 
129. teigs is going to vomit!
130. "diving" in head first....... vim.
131. honestly, i don't know teigs real name....
132. he has tips? oh, cause he's a shark tamer? or he's done this before?
133. they're just sand sharks!- adam. 
134. dad says they're used to humans and they don't attack. 
135. i still wouldn't do it. 
136. ben looks more scared....
137. i would NOT like this challenge. 
138. kacie needs to learn how to play the game: act like a scared ninny  and you get all the attention!
139.  cheryl teigs looks a lot better au naturale. 
140. all of the girls do..
141. at this point, they all look fried and tired and over this. 
142. that top on teigs is bad and maternal and strange. bad print, bad cut.
143. i think nikki is going home on this....
144. don't baby talk when you're talking about your family, weirdo! 
145. aaand again... sun + booze = trashed nikki.
146. kacie looks WASTED!
147. my hair would look scarier than hers.... 
148. too bad ben can't grow a beard like a REAL man- adam. 
149. kacie can barely keep her eyes open. 
150. is he really presenting this in front of all of them. 
151. did he wax his chest?! look at those ingrowns!
152. good. kacie for the rose. 
153. is she really creeping on this?!
154. i feel bad for nikki...she seems to be gaining a bit of weight thru this season...
155. ooooooh! good! the courtney stuff comes out!
156. that was tactful, nikki. 
157. woof! bird flu earrings. 
158. pretty color on courtney. 
159. nikki.... get rid of the dumpy uniboob dresses. 
160. lindz's skin color is clashing with that dress.
161. what?! orange and purple doesn't go together?!- adam.
162.  i think nikki and cheryl teigs are going home.....
163. courtney is so obnoxious. 
164. kacie should have let her hair go curly... she needs my curl mixture. 
165. it looks fab in the confessional and WILTED at the cocktail party. 
166. cheryl is falling apart already?!
167. lindzi is constantly speaking in a vocal fry (you singers get that?)
168. kace didn't need good hair tonight... she already has a rose. 
169. ben is talking to courtney like a pediatrician- nicole. 
170. ahahah! i love nikki - you know, there MAY or MAY NOT  have been some talk about courtney...
171. Teigs: so do you think i have enough time to smoke a pack before they come back- adam. 
172. woah! nikki! that's a surprise!
173. ok.. now lindzi is going home...
174. what?! no!
175. emily is getting the axe. 
176. no way! she must think court threw her under the bus. 
177. cute dress on emily. 
178. welp... this just confirms that ben is the STUPIDEST bachelor in bachelor history. 
179. emily is SO lucky. she'll find a hot dr and be so glad she's out of this shitshow. 
180. did he just hot whisper "take care" in her ear?! gross. 
181. did ben not see courtney say "see ya, wouldn't wanna be ya!" ???
182. he had nothing to say to emily? he's a pig. 
183. courtney has a family?! i just assumed she didn't have a family!- jaycob
184. you guys, black widow spiders aren't afraid of tarantellas. 

oh these hometowns look RIPE!

are you kids surprised? 

i am. i liked emily and their date looked fun. she's too smart for him.